I haven't written in a bit because I've been horribly ashamed at the way I've been parenting lately. I've kept the tv watching to a bare minimum, and Pearl has been playing with Play-Doh, reading books, drawing, painting. But I've just been a bitch the last day or so. Not really listening to her, not wanting to play. She has this natural enthusiasm, and I just take it as annoying. I guess, on my better days, I'm fine with it, and I smile at it. But this morning, as I was getting her ready for school, I was just being annoyed. Here I have all day to myself, and I can't even spend 45 minutes really being with my child, listening to her? What the hell am I doing? On the drive to school, I apologized to her for being grumpy, and she smiled and said "That's okay, Mommy!" I think I had better wake up and appreciate the gift God's given me.
I was talking to my sister last night, after a bedtime battle with Pearl, and she (my sister) said, "You're doing just fine, most people would have medicated her by now."
"But she's not hyperactive! Just intense."
"I think you just don't see it because you're her mom."
So great, now her aunt, whom Pearl loves dearly, thinks she's hyperactive. I know not everyone will like her as she goes through her life. I know that, right now, some people find her too intense to deal with. But I know, I know that my child is fine, that there's nothing about her that needs medicated, or supressed or squashed. I think we all just have to stop being such uptight sticks-in-the-mud.
Sigh. Now I just want to hug her.
--N
LATELY
My New Page - 2006-04-15
Life is a Magic Thing, Woah. - 2005-11-18
No Dooce for You! - 2005-11-09
The Nicest Thing Anyone Has Ever Said To Me - 2005-09-05
Ugh. Grunt. Some Other Stuff. - 2005-09-01
RANDOM ENTRY
all words � ME, 2005.