~~~some assembly required~~~

*some assembly required

Pearl's Birth: Part II
assembled @ 12:37 p.m. on 2002-07-01

Pearl's Birth: Part II

The continuing story of my daughter's birth... Read the first part here.

Nell led us up to the birthing center, holding my hand, and we all stopped when I had a contraction, as I felt the need to squat with each one. Once we arrived, I changed into my favorite nightgown, which I had worn all through pregnancy. I'm sure that I had an exam to find out how dialated I was, but I really don't recall, and the next few hours were a bit of a blur. Hero says my contractions slowed down a bit, so we began walking. I remember the walking. I remember that at about 4:30 am or so, Hero went to sleep, and Nell, along with Sandy the student midwife, walked with me. Back and forth, back and forth, across the birth center. There is a print hanging there, of the Cassat painting of a mother and child, and that print is burned in my memory. I went down on my hands and knees each time a contraction hit. I remember thinking that there was supposed to be a little more progress than I was feeling, but I wasn't worried. I trusted the process. Nell said if things weren't moving by about 6:00 am, we would talk about rupturing my membranes. This really scared me, because it was an Intervention, and I had wanted No Interventions. So I kept walking, and walking. About 5:30 I said that I had to take a little nap, since I hadn't slept slept since 10:00 am the morning before. I didn't actually sleep, but it felt so good to just stop walking!

Then Nell came in and talked to Hero and I about rupturing the membranes. I asked her why she thought we should do this, and she said that it would definitely speed things up. That, without rupturing, I would probably have the baby around 1 or 2 pm, and with it, around 10 am. Then, thoughtful woman that she is, she left Hero and I alone to talk about it for a few minutes. We decided that, in my exhausted state, it would probably be a good thing to break the bag of waters. Plus, the midwives were not ones to suggest interventions unless they really felt that intervention was necessary, so we could trust their opinions. That's why we chose them as our birth attendants. We made our decision and then I wanted to cry because I felt like I had failed somehow, and oh, because I was in labor and tired. Looking back on it now, though, and knowing a little more about the pros and cons of artificial rupture of membranes, I would have made the same choice. So it all worked out.

We called Nell back in, told her our decision and they got to work. It was the weirdest feeling as they poked at that bag; all squeaky and tickly. Then it broke and the amniotic fluid was clear, which is a Good Thing. After that, things progressed quickly to a far more active phase of labor. I stripped off my nightgown without thought of modesty and climbed into the hot tub. That was heavenly, as I could move around a lot better, and the water was so warm and comforting. Gravity was lessened and I could relax a bit. I spent the rest of the first stage and part of transistion in the hot tub. My mind was in an altered state, I was so inwardly focused. It was like words were barely present in my head, and time didn't really exist. I would float along until a contraction came, then I would groan through it, making it through one at a time. I remember the room growing gradually lighter with that early morning quality that I love. I didn't want anyone to touch me. Hero put his hand on my shoulder and I asked him to stop. I remember Nell clipping my bangs back with a barrette, and how good it felt not to have that hair touching me anymore. Someone turned on soothing, quiet music and I couldn't stand it, but it was all I could do to get out the words "no music". Hero translated for me. I didn't know it at the time, but there was one point when he was crying, just because he wanted to help me, felt that he needed to, but couldn't. Poor Hero, though. He sat behind me sniffing, and I listened as long as I could (which wasn't long) and then told him tersely, "Go blow your nose." Which he did, and then we both felt much better. Well, I did, anyway.

After a while, when the room was very bright with morning, a contraction came and rather than moaning with it, a grunt came out of my mouth. It surprised me, but the midwives were very happy and laughed. A few more of those, and Nell said that it was time to get out of the hot tub and on to the bed.

One more piece to be born....

then || now